Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
