Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
