But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize