she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
