just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
