Where did you get a picture of my penis
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
