One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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