how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Someone signed my nipple.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize