Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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