I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
