So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize
