I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
