actually, I'm a sock model
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
