i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Even the bartender felt bad for me
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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