:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
