dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Ladies don't puke and tell
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
