Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize