I hope mine doesn't look like that
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
