he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
