He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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