Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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