I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
