Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
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