New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
