So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
