I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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