the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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