ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
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