I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
