we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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