Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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