i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
