It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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