She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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