your thong is hanging out like whoa
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
