im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
