she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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