I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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