Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
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