Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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