How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
