your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
