I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
high people should be assigned attendants
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Randomize