Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
