The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
