I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize