they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
