she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
