she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
