I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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