p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
